| An update finally |
[04 Nov 2006|01:25pm] |
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mood |
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 chipper |
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Well I finally got all the pictures off of my camera. Some have been there since sometime in August (right before the kiddos went back to school). I thought maybe it was time to do a little update and share the pictures with all of you! BTW...sorry for all the different types of slideshows here. I was playing with all the options and didn't figure out how to change the style until after I had already posted the first one. Yeah...I know...I'm slow.
These are at the new Dippin' Dots store in Hilliard, OH with my sister's kids. Jacob is 13, Emily is 12 (?) and Lydia is 10 (?). Yeah, I'm a bad aunt, I am not entirely sure exactly how old they are. I do know Jacob will be 14 in December.
Slideshow
I didn't take a whole bunch of pics while on vacation at the end of September due to being sick. Here are some of comedian Darren Carter the Party Starter! Also, after the show at Crackers Starbuck, Jimmy, Angie, Jeremy and I, went to Jillians and played a couple games of bowling. I tried to get everyone in an "action" shot but it didn't quite turn out like I envisioned. Darn alcohol has a way of making things look a lot cooler than they really are. A lot funnier too.
Slideshow 1
Slideshow 2
At the park (school playground) with Arika in September. I was babysitting her while her mommy was having surgery. She's a handful. I think even Jeremy had fun having her around for a little while.
Slideshow
Last but not least, here are a few of the pumpkins that the departments in our hotel carved for the annual Pumpkin Carving Contest. Several departments turned theirs in late and I didn't have my camera on those days so I don't have every pumpkin that was displayed. Heck, I don't even have the winner pictured here. Oh well!
Slideshow
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| Odd Decisions |
[24 Sep 2006|04:41pm] |
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mood |
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music |
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Fantastic Four on HBO |
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I'm going to need to do a lot of research on this decision I've just made, but I think it will be good for me. I caught the tail end of a program on HBO talking about Quinceaneras. Traditionally, hispanic families celebrate the 15th birthdays of their daughters with a special party. As of right now, I think that I would like to do this for my daughter (assuming I have one).
The Quinceañera has its origins many centuries ago when both boys and girls participated in rites of passage.
To prepare for "womanhood," girls were separated from other children at the age of 15 so the elder women could teach them about their future roles as members of family and community. During the official rites of passage, the community would thank the gods for the future wives and mothers, and the young women would vow to serve the community.
Later, missionaries turned the event into a personal affirmation of faith by the young women and a pledge to become good Christian wives and mothers. A church celebration became an important part of the occasion.
Today, the Quinceañera celebration often is a lavish party that includes a mariachi band, a feast and many guests – much like a wedding. The young woman wears an elaborate dress in pink, white, light blue or lavender.
Traditions include receiving a church blessing, having 14 attendants and escorts to represent the previous 14 years of life, presenting a porcelain doll to a younger sister to symbolize leaving childhood behind, changing from flats into high-heeled shoes to represent becoming a young woman, and dancing the first dance with the young woman's father.
I was certainly not brought up to appreciate or even really recognize my heritage. While my children will only be 1/4 hispanic I personally don't think that matters. 1/2, 1/4, 1/8 it's all the same. There will still be the bloodlines of their ancestors flowing through their veins just as it is in mine. Every year I think more and more about how I wish I could have known my family better and how I wish I could have been somehow more apart of the community that I partly belong to. I'm not saying I want to raise my kids to only appreciate their mexican heritage, but I certainly want them to be a little more cultured in that aspect than I was as as child.
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| 192 and dropping |
[17 Aug 2006|09:28pm] |
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About to hit the sack, but I remembered I wanted to start keeping track of moderate progress somewhere.
Jeremy and I finally joined the YMCA here in Columbus and I've been going to work out at least every other day. I figure to get things started this isn't a bad routine. I do 20-30 minutes on the eliptical machine and sweat my ass off then do a few lifting exercises with dumbells and the tricep pull machine. So far the lifting is what has me feeling the most "work". My goal is an overhaul of my whole body, not simply just weight loss. So, working on my arms and strengthening them up is a definte priority. Weight loss will still be key too, so here we start today at 192 according to the scales there. I go to the doc on August 23, so I'll get an offical weight there. We've definitly been eating a lot healthier here lately without actually going on a "diet" persay. We'll see.
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| My New Car |
[31 Jul 2006|09:35pm] |
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mood |
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 ecstatic |
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It's new to me anyway. It's a 1997 Honda Civic HX. This will be the first car I'll have purchased completely on my own. Kind of a scary thought really. The good news is that when everything is said and done this will help my credit a whole ton of a bunch. I like that idea.
I'm very happy with it. I'll try and get some pics up soon.
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| Sorry I've been MIA |
[24 Jul 2006|03:37pm] |
I thought maybe it was time to catch those of you who only read my LJ up to date. So here's just a cut and paste of my most recent myspace blog. =)
For those of you who didn't pay attention during the 4th of July week (I don't blame you, I woulda been partying too) Jeremy's grandfather passed away on the 3rd and we spent nearly the entire week in New Castle with family. I'm finally getting some pictures up from our time there. They aren't really in order, because my camera got them all mixed up, but I'm going to try and group them together for your viewing pleasure.
( Many Pictures )
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[08 Jul 2006|03:24pm] |
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This has been such a weird week I don't even know where to start. Amy left on monday and I cried. I waited till they left the apartment complex, but I cried. I hated to see her go but I know it was time for her to move on. I think part of the trouble is I don't like that feeling of not knowing when I'm going to see someone again. Family...I know I'm going to see them. I'll see mom at work, I'll see the kids before they go back to school. Jeremy and I go visit his family at least once a month*ish*. But Amy, I never know where she's going to be, who she's going tobe staying with or how to really get a hold of her if she doesn't have computer access. So its always a mystery toss up and I guess that's what gets me down about it all.
To top that off, we also got the call monday evening that Jeremy's grandfather *Papaw* passed away. I cried. We left right after Amy did to drive to New Castle and go be with family. My manager loves me and let me have the whole week off of work so that I could go to the funeral friday morning. So monday night we got into town and played with fireworks with his parents. Tuesday we sort of just hung around all day and played with more fireworks. Oh yeah, we did go to lunch with the whole family at Applebee's. His brother and family were there, his uncle and his grandma, and his mom and stepdad. Wednesday we chilled for the better part of the day then stayed the night with his grandma. I helped her pick 3 songs for the funeral and we watched the movie The Mummy with her. She was holding up pretty well at that point and only really cried while we were listening to the songs trying to pick something. Thursday morning we had coffee and breakfast with Mamaw then headed back over to his mom's place. Thursday evening was the viewing and I think one of the harder nights on everyone. It was open casket and I really hate going through that. Its hard enough to say goodbye but to see him lying there looking so peaceful, I found myself willing it all to be some cruel dream or joke. For me, I'm not sure what was hardest. Losing the only grandpa I've ever had *unoffically at that* or watching Jeremy go through so much pain. For the 5 years we've been together I've always known that day would come, he's always talked about dreading the d ay that Papaw would be gone and to have it finally come was a bit rough to say the least. 5 years of dreading this moment, and many times with our breakups and whatnot that I was afraid it would happen and I wouldn't know about it. We'll come back to this later. Moving on right now... Friday morning was the funeral and that was difficult too, but not quite as much. The goodbyes had pretty much been said, the shock of seeing him in the casket was past. While the preacher talked of faith and God's compassion I couldn't help but smile. I have that faith that he was talking about so I know in my heart that Papaw is better now, in a place without pain and suffering, but the tears of the family weighed heavily on me. Jeremy's tears hurt the worst and I just kept my arm around him and my hand on his back holding him. His mom's tears....I felt so helpless. I gave her hugs, I sat next to her, I tried to smile for her and just in general let her know that I was there. What else could I do? Where else would I be? Friday afternoon Jeremy drove me back to Ohio, we met my mom half way and had dinner with her. He's back in Indiana now doing his regularly scheduled events for the weekend. The last thing Papaw would have wanted was for Jeremy to miss a golf trip.
I'm so blessed to be a part of that family. I wonder sometimes if they really know how much I love and appreciate them. From the first time Jeremy invited me to town and I met them they've been nothing but wonderful and honest to me. They've taken me in and done so much for Jeremy and I together as a couple because that's just what families do. Heck, they've sat through Jeremy and I yelling at eachother in their house, and sat knowingly as we apologized for putting them through it. I can't imagine how hard it is for a mother to sit in her own house and listen to her son get yelled at by his girlfriend and not say a word and not butt in. We've always worked these things out though, and when it is all said and done I respect his mother and appreciate her all that much more for not interferring. As for his grandma, oh I adore that woman! She's a country grandma, stubborn and set in her ways but she has a heart of gold. One of the times Jeremy and I broke up, she insisted that I could still come and visit with her when he wasn't there. I think that said it all, I was sold.
I cherish the few memories of Papaw that I have. Hearing him talk of baseball and his grandkids and great grandkids. Hearing him "spar" verbally with Jeremy and all of Jeremy's stories about growing up, being watched for by mamaw and papaw. I'm going to miss his smile and his laughter whenever we go over there. It might even take awhile to get used to the idea that I no longer need to wonder how he's doing or if he's back in the hospital again. Yeah, its going to take a while to get used to the idea.
I truly am the lucky one, to be able to be a part of their lives.
Of course, all of this got me thinking about other things too. Several years back I wrote a poem to my grandfathers, both of whom I've never met. My dad's dad died 3 years before I was born and my mom lost contact with her dad long before that. Really, for all I know he could be out there somewhere still, but I'm pretty sure the family has passed the news along that he passed away at some point. I can't find the poem anymore, but I remember expressing the idea that if they are in heaven that I look forward to the day I'll get to meet them, with no judgment, and get to ask them all my questions and hear them tell of their lives. For some reason...I don't think heaven really works like that, but its still a nice idea. So hopefully, Papaw is up there, telling my grandfathers about me, reassuring my grandmother I've turned out okay, and one day I'll join them all.
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| Protecting Marriage.... |
[12 Jun 2006|04:11pm] |
Ronald Reagan - divorced the mother of two of his children to marry Nancy Reagan, who bore him a daughter only 7 months after the marriage. That means he cheated and got someone else pregnant, kids!
Bob Dole - divorced the mother of his child, who had nursed him through the long recovery from his war wounds.
Rep. Bob Barr of Georgia - Barr, not yet 50 years old, has been married three times. Barr had the audacity to author and push the "Defense of Marriage Act." The current joke making the rounds on Capitol Hill is "Bob Barr...WHICH marriage are you defending?!?
Newt Gingrich - divorced his wife who was dying of cancer.
Dick Armey - House Majority Leader - divorced
Sen. Phil Gramm of Texas - divorced
Gov. John Engler of Michigan - divorced
Gov. Pete Wilson of California - divorced
George Will - divorced
Sen. Lauch Faircloth - divorced
Rush Limbaugh - Rush and his current wife Marta have six marriages and four divorces between them.
Sen. Alfonse D'Amato of New York - divorced
Sen. John Warner of Virginia - divorced (once married to Liz Taylor.)
Gov. George Allen of Virginia - divorced
Henry Kissinger - divorced
Rep. Helen Chenoweth of Idaho - divorced
Sen. John McCain of Arizonia - divorced
Rep. John Kasich of Ohio - divorced
Rep. Susan Molinari of New York - Republican National Convention Keynote Speaker - divorced
So ... homosexuals are going to destroy the institution of marriage? Wait a minute, it seems the Christian Heterosexual Republicans are doing a fine job without anyone's help!
Heterosexual marriages have created a 50% chance of divorce. While homosexuals haven't been given the chance to have a marriage.
If you agree, like we do, that hypocricy and bigotry must end, repost this.
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| Dear Diary |
[11 Jun 2006|04:51pm] |
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I probably ought to update here more often. I usually only update my myspace and even that I don't do on a terribly regualr basis. But here, just for those who read my thoughts on this site....
Enjoy my past "diary" entries if you will. Or don't because...well they are mostly me bitching about something or other.
( 8/29/05-6/11/06 )
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| To do list |
[11 May 2006|05:02pm] |
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-blog on NY Trip with pictures and whatnot. I'm actually over telling some of the stories already, but maybe that's because it all ends with the last 2-3 days of the trip I'm sick. It was still good though and at least worth a real entry
-check credit report *especially if I'm serious about this new car thing*
-clean computer desk
-file paperwork on desk *yes those go hand in hand*
-plug in new papershredder I bought over a month ago and actually shred the stuff that needs shredded *also in line with the above items*
-clean bedroom
-rent carpet cleaner and clean carpets *or hire someone to do it, there's a thought. I'm even willing to pay a friend to do it if they have the means, any takers?*
-go join the YMCA *due to financial issues yet again this may have to wait a week or two for the tips to start coming in again and bills to be paid again*
-take the boxes of dishes to New Uses and sell them *its a complete set for 4 and I don't need it anymore. I'll take whatever they'll give me*
-take the boxes and bags of items to goodwill to donate *some of it has been sitting here bagged for over a year now*
-decide what to do with the old lime imac that's been sitting useless for nearly a year
-get a new printer
-buy new book case so I can get rid of the piles of movies and books everywhere
-go on vacation with jeremy *still have a week of vacay left to use, Woot*
Maybe I should have titled this "everything I want to get done before the end of the year" This all comes on the day that I'm told some things will start to change at work, for the better for me. It's been brewing for a while now and I like to keep my work/professional life off the internet so I've never really mentioned it, but it should be coming out officially soon and that makes me happy. It means a slightly better foothold financially for me and I like that a lot. Of course, it just means I should continue to live as is and put the rest into savings, but we'll see how that really goes. My saving habits took a hit with that whole paypal issue months ago and I've never gotten back into the habit of putting my money aside. Bad me.
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| Happy 25th Birthday Jeremy |
[07 Apr 2006|03:50pm] |
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mood |
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 cheerful |
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Alright, now that it has been said, time to move on with life. Hehe. It's just that we celebrated last weekend and all that so it's an anticlimatic sort of day. Well, and he got his birthday luvins last night so...yeah.
It's been a weird few days at work. My unbearable supervisor has been nice to me and has even complimented me a time or two. It's hard to stay frustrated with someone being nice to you. Okay not really, she still frustrates me but at least the atmosphere is better.
Yesterday, heard from Chris again. He called me right before he left for basic, then wrote me one letter while he was at basic. Now he's out of basic and doing his AIT (?) somewhere in Texas. He sounds like life is treating him well and that things are looking better. He said he lost 50 lbs and I'm sure that has a whole lot to do with his change of mindset. We talked about some of his upcoming plans and how things are going in life in general. So it was good to at least hear from him. A familiar voice that I recognized again, that dumbass I met in Indy that saw me through some of my tougher times. Instead of that dumbass to left Indy and was making a mess of his life *he had help there though.*
And I guess that's all. We'll be off to New Castle in about an hour, just about the time they say it is supposed to start storming and what not. Joy Joy! We'll just have to drop the dog off at my parent's place. He gets to go on a little vacation too and its better than a kennel. =)
Laters
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| Fatally Flawed |
[21 Mar 2006|04:50pm] |
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I had a moment of writer's insanity last night and we had a moment of hashing some things out. It all led to this and then I passed out after a fury or writing.
Cut wide open gutted for all the world to view what's on the inside
A beautiful heart that breaks over and over for others
The battle scars the telltale signs of a life lived for everyone else.
A fatal flaw.
Unable to deal with the idea of self, pushing away anyone wanting a deeper look. When pressed, a fight erupts. Anger, pain, confusion and sorrow take center stage. People end up hurt and the delicately built world collapses.
Never wanted to hurt anyone. Don't want to hurt anyone. Dealing with the knowledge people have been hurt. Can't hide from this one.
Fatal flaw, must be removed.
Don't want to hurt them anymore. Don't want to hurt him anymore. Make people smile all day long. When it really matters, smile's gone. Confused how it came to this.
Time to show you all
I am fatally flawed.
*note to self*
There's an upside to this and you know it's fact. The price for this flaw has been paid in full, it's time to give the burden away. It's overdue to be exact.
I've thought a lot lately about what to do, what to be, who to become. I've thought about why I'm happy, besides the reasons of my faith because that has always been my underlying joy. I've lived for others and their joy has always been my joy. I have my own joy now, I have this man I love. I need to better about showing him the joy he brings me. The smile he puts on my face, the smile he puts on my proverbial heart.
He cannot be replaced. There is no substitution. I truly and honestly believe we have been put together for this right here. This labor of love, this pain that only real love can bring. This growth that can only be achieved when you are stretched.
Advancement require risks. No advancement is without risk.
We risked a lot here, without even realizing it. I think we advanced. More risks will follow. I embrace this future.
3/20/06
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| I don't want to care and I don't want to hate |
[01 Mar 2006|08:33pm] |
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Okay, I admit it. I'm a closet RadioU junkie from time to time. Honestly, I SERIOUSLY dislike the morning show, but that's probably because I dislike all morning shows on radio. The bits I've listened to though have left me completely unimpressedr so I ignore the station in the mornings. However, from time to time depending on the mood you catch me in, you'll find my car stereo tuned into RadioU. Here are the lyrics to the song that currently holds my interest. Enjoy!
Plumb- Better
You live inside a dream
Everything tastes so sweet
As long as it agrees with how you feel
You're dancing in your sleep
'Til all the eyes that look at me
awaken your anxieties
You're so afraid, so you try to break me, yeah
I don't want to care
And I don't want to hate
And I don't want to see you fall too far away
All because of fear
'Cause when you're afraid
You lash out at me
When you say all the things that you never meant to say
And try to break me
But in the end, what leaves you broken
In the end, makes you better, yeah
Your face looks so green
When the sun is shining differently
And you're standing in the shade
'Cause face to face you're sweet
Like candy sticking to my teeth
But underneath so damaging
There is no strength in trying to break me, no
I don't want to care
And I don't want to hate
And I don't want to see you fall too far away
All because of fear
'Cause when you're afraid
You lash out at me
When you say all the things that you never meant to say
And try to break me
But in the end, what leaves you broken
in the end, makes you better
Yeah, I don't want to hate
I don't want to be broken
I don't want to hate you
I don't want to hate
I don't want to be broken
I don't want to hate you
I don't want to care
and I don't want to hate
and I don't want to see you fall too far away
All because of fear
'Cause when you're afraid
you lash out at me
When you say all the things that you never meant to say
and try to break me
But in the end, what leaves you broken
In the end, makes you better, Yeah
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| Great author dies |
[13 Feb 2006|07:39pm] |
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I was saddened today to learn that one of my favorite authors has passed away. I've had a life long obsession with sharks, mostly due to the fact that I loved the movie Jaws, and for many years all the sequels. I'm a little more discerning now, but there's no getting around the fact that Jaws is and was a movie great.
Peter Benchly died yesterday at the age of 65 and it makes me sad to think the world has lost a man with such a heart for protecting sharks and educating adults and children alike the truth of how beautiful they really are. I've read many of his books, and own several and while he has a way of invoking fear and terror, his love and admiration for the animals carries through. He writes with passion, and in turn it stirs a passion within his readers. At least, it did for me. I regret that I'll never again purchase a new book written by this talented author. I think I'll reread some of his books in the coming weeks. =)
Here's the article about his death and life.
Peter Benchly
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| He Took The Wheel |
[11 Feb 2006|11:31am] |
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I was on my way home from work today and this song came on and it reminded me once again of just how blessed I've been. Every person has their own "rock bottom." We each have our own place that feels like we can't get any lower and our faith seems to be gone. I had reached that time in my life, the truest love I had ever known and felt had failed me, the money coming in wasn't nearly enough to cover the holes I had dug for myself, and my relationships with friends and family were stressed if existent at all. I was merely the shell of a person going on autopilot, and when I felt it had all spun out of control, I threw my hands up in the air and said I can't do it on my own. As this song states, that's when Jesus took the wheel.
Artist: Carrie Underwood
Song: Jesus, Take The Wheel
Album: Some Hearts
She was driving last Friday on her way to Cincinnati
On a snow white Christmas Eve
Going home to see her Mama and her Daddy with the baby in the backseat
Fifty miles to go and she was running low on faith and gasoline
It been a long hard year
She had a lot on her mind and she didn't pay attention
She was going way to fast
Before she knew it she was spinning on a thin black sheet of glass
She saw both their lives flash before her eyes
She didn't even have time to cry
She was sooo scared
She threw her hands up in the air
Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this all on my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I'm on
Jesus take the wheel
It was still getting colder when she made it to the shoulder
And the car came to a stop
She cried when she saw that baby in the backseat sleeping like a rock
And for the first time in a long time
She bowed her head to pray
She said I'm sorry for the way
I've been living my life
I know I've got to change
So from now on tonight
Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this all my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I'm on
Oh, Jesus take the wheel
Oh, I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
Save me from this road I'm on
From this road I'm on
Jesus take the wheel
Oh, take it, take it from me
Oh, why, oh
I've been a different person since then, never taking for granted the fact that I still have my family that loves me and is willing to help me. That love, rekindled and now we're doing better than we ever had. Those debts, are almost all paid off and here I am, living a better life than I thought I could. Sure, it could be better...and I believe it will get better. Right here and right now however, are going just fine. I know I wouldn't be here if I had continued to struggle and just make it on my own.
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| YAY! The End is Here! |
[06 Feb 2006|04:32pm] |
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mood |
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The end of all the troubles I had with paypal and my bank account that is. The bank manager added up all the overdraft fees I was charged while waiting for paypal to sort out my claim and he credited them back to my checking account. YAY. So, right now, I kind of sort of have extra money. I'm thinking, instead of transfering the nearly $200 that was taken from my savings account, Jeremy and I are going to go find out how much it's going to cost to join the YMCA and finally get that in gear. We both need it. I know I sure as hell do.
So, a great weight has finally been lifted off my shoulders. Today is monday, a new week and I'm back in the black again instead of swimming in the red.
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| I just want it over with |
[23 Jan 2006|10:50pm] |
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I finally got someone at the bank that had a clue *he was shocked to hear that the account manager at the other branch had never heard of Paypal before*. We filed the Affidavit of Unauthorized Use but of course, I might just be changing the banks forms and causing a disruption for them. THey don't have a category for this sort of thing. Because this isn't a credit card or debit card charge it doesn't fit into one set of their options. And because its not a fradulent check it doesn't fit into the other set of their options. So technically, they may look at the form and decide, that a transfer from my bank account to another account may not be disputeable. WTF?!
Along those lines, the $1710.00 that they "gave back" to me, will probably be charged again by paypal in 3 days since it was returned unpaid. Even though they have it flagged as an unauthorized transaction, they can't stop their outside processor from trying to push it through again. So, in 3 days, that $1710 charge will hit my bank account again. Yippie.
I suddenly hate technology and ebay for ever creating their little service known as paypal. I know, its not their fault. Its either my fault for somehow comprimising my hotmail account, or hotmail's fault for somehow being hacked so that my account was accessed by someone else. I sent MSN a support email today to notify them of what happened. Do I think it will do any good? Probably not, but I've at least reported the email address *another hotmail user* to them and let them know that I've filed complaints against them with paypal and my bank. At least then if MSN gets notified or questioned, they might be more willing to respond and help?
As I go to bed tonight I can't help but think "Why me?" I'm tired. I'm frustrated. I'm stressed. I put the smile on my face and continue to go through another day hoping it really is all going to work out sooner rather than later. I hate this feeling of knowing that right now, there is nothing else that I can do.
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| A better day |
[22 Jan 2006|10:40am] |
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 mellow |
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Okay that last entry was actually written on the 21st. I'm just slow about updating here after I update on myspace.
Today is a much better day. The bank already returned $1,710.00 to my account (which was technically never taken from my account because my account was negative already) and i'm currently only negative $20ish. Once I print the affadavits I need from paypal *doing that later today* I can go to a Fifth Third Branch and get their affadavit form that I need and dispute the remaining transaction with them. I'm feeling a little better now that the end is getting closer and all my money that was there will be returned in a somewhat timely matter. Maybe even in time for me to be able to pay my own rent without assistance from family. *deep sigh* that would be so nice.
So today I feel as if a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. It's a good feeling.
Today Jeremy and I are supposed to head to the dollar theatre to see Aeonflux (sp?). We went to see SawII yesterday and I wasn't sold on it until the end. It would have been worth the $6 to view it as a matinee when it was out to start with, but $1 wasn't bad either. I'd pay it again if someone else wanted to see it. *nod* Heck, the popcorn and soda prices are even better at the dollar theatre *though we only bought soda*. So today should be a good day. And this week should be a better week. Here's to hoping anyway.
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| What I think, not what I can prove |
[22 Jan 2006|10:33am] |
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mood |
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I think:
my hotmail was somehow "hacked" into
that person got my paypal password
thatperson changed filter settings AFTER I changed my hotmail password *sothey got it again? or maybe I'm just blind and they had changed itbefore I did and I didn't notice even though I looked specifically atmy filters. I've been in a stressed mode since yesterday its possible*
that person logged into my paypal and sent themselves $2000 over two transactions
So,after everything is worked out, I'm going to just ignore my hotmailaccount for anything real *when I signed up for paypal it was the onlyemail I had* and hang onto it so no one else can ever have use of itand potentially create problems for me. Yeah.
I finally got theforms I need from paypal so I can sign them and send them back so theycan fix my account and get the money back to my bank. I can also takesaid form to my bank so they can see the charges were fradulent, thatI'm fighting them and restore my bank account to a healthy standing.Also, so I don't lose the $500.66 I deposited on friday before Irealized anything had happened.
While the end is not in sight just yet, there is a glimmer of light at the end of this tunnel.
Atthis time, I want to thank my wonderful boyfriend who has beentolerating my tears of frustration, my outbursts of anger, and myoverall bad/bitter mood about this situation. He's held me, hugged me,watched movies and tv shows with me and even made me dinner tonight.Without him here with me trying to keep me calm I'm sure I would haveflipped out yesterday and would have been unable to recover allweekend.
I'd also like to thank my family that has listened tome over the phone and for them trying to mentally help figure this oneout. They were all worried about me, even though they all showed it indifferent ways. Even my dad, that I threatened to disown earliertonight, has showed his concern and offered to help. I don't give himcredit sometimes but some of the comments he made while I was in a"really super frustrated and upset" state of mind didn't help and Iflew off the handle a little. I'll probably need to apologize for thattomorrow. *nod*
That's all. Later
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| Poker Night |
[07 Jan 2006|11:37pm] |
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mood |
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 bored |
] |
So its poker night here in the Anderson/Davis household. We're both online playing poker and I guess I'm doing alright. Holding my own for the most part at some 7 card stud.
Jeremy did a nice thing and switched chairs with me so I'm not dying here at my desk. That's really why you don't see me around that often. I HATE sitting in the other computer chair *its too low and feels like it has no padding*.
However, despite the playing I still feel bored as utter crap. No one on my buddy lists is online on yahoo or aim that I usually talk to and feel like I can talk about just anything with so I'm sitting here in relative silence. I can't really talk to Jeremy because he has a headset on and chats with his poker buddies all night every night. So yeah, occasionally I'll say something or make a comment or ask an opinion, but generally speaking I just try to stay quiet and ignore his half of his conversations. It gets old real quick. That's probably the other reason I don't sit in here for that long too often too. I know I tend to talk out loud to myself a lot, but he's usually not paying attention and never responds anyway so I don't feel too bad about it.
I'm just in a funk tonight. Trying to save money for a casino trip with the family at the end of the month and we're going to Indiana next weekend for a football party with his dad to watch the colts. So, extraneous spending is being kept to a minimum when at all possible. Okay, ignore the two rings I bought this week. They were practically a steal and I deserve some nice jewelry for once in my life. I haven't worn a ring in forever, probably because the last one given to me was by my ex and I sent it back and well...I'm past that stage of wanting to wear Claire's jewelry. That's about all I could afford the past several years anyway.
Oh well. Ignore my ramblings. It's my blog and I'm just airing for myself so I have "someone" to talk to. It did't really help that much truth be told. I did win a hand while I was babbling here however. That's always a plus.
later
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